Finding Me Series: Confidence Reconnection
Life in the last two years has affected everyone somehow or another. I am sure we have said that we cannot believe what 2020 and 2021 sent our way. However, we are here still living, thriving, and wondering. I decided to stay put where I am because I had built a life for myself the last three years and had chosen to be an international professor. Because of this, it caused me to have some down days. The last time I was at home was the summer of 2019, the last time I hugged my mom, hugged my family, was able to walk around and feel the presence of my dad. This is what I have missed because of the pandemonium. Despite the down, I have had some ups and want to believe and will believe that I have had more ups than down days. I refuse to let this, whatever you want to call it, only have adverse outcomes in my life. This has been a time I have continued to learn, find and embrace Me.
I have not been confident in myself and my power during the last few months. I began to have thoughts and voice those thoughts around the idea that my accomplishments did not matter, that what I had done and doing wasn't essential and did not matter. Because of this, anxiety and depression started to creep into my life. At this time, I wondered what was happening to my confidence? It made me look back at events and wonder why acceptance at those tables didn't happen and if something was wrong with me? These are hard questions to ask yourself, and yes, sometimes we want to blame the other parties. Once I took time to quiet the noise and truly focused on myself in those situations, I began to uncover what was happening and what had happened.
First, I realized I was losing my confidence because I wasn't living my authentic life. Second, it wasn't the other parties that were not accepting me at those tables; it was the fact that I was trying to be at tables that I did not belong, that did not align with my authentic self. All of this allowed room for doubts to creep in, and the noise was overriding the calm. It wasn't until I got quiet that I realized what was happening. I learned that I have to protect my well-being. Protecting my well-being was coming to terms with my emotions, that they were genuine, valid, and I needed to own it and deal with them. Only then would I be able to live my life authentically.
I have decided it is time to reconnect with my confidence and stand in my power. Letting go of what was and who I thought I should be and embracing who I am and who I am becoming. Being honest about things that I was holding onto did not allow me to embrace Me fully. I am relearning what it means when I say, "I AM My Greatest Me; Becoming, Being, and Sustaining."
If you can relate to sometimes having to reconnect with your confidence and power. Join me for a 7 Day Challenge Making My Well-Being About Me, starting February 7, 2022.
